...and the lack of excitement thereof

Ever had those boring days when you wished your life's more exciting (like you're a spy or a big rock star or something)?  Well, I'm having a major blackout today coz there's no electricity.  Not literally, but you know, there's a total lack of spark in my immediate surroundings right now.  It might as well be dark and utterly still. Anyway, I drove to work today as usual.  It was uneventful, thank God (I'm not really wishing for excitement on the road).  Parked my car, had breakfast (the usual), and went straight to work.  Had to finish a press release about Fitch Ratings affirming my company's national rating, blah, blah, blah.  Oh it was so exciting to write the article literally wrote itself -- NOT! 

Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but sometimes, writing about fnancial performance, acquisition, branch expansion, and all that corporate jazz can be truly mind-numbing.  I want to be sent to some exotic country and write about the spots worth checking out, or sample a fascinating new restaurant and rant or rave about it, or do a piece on celebs, rockstars, fashion, beauty.  I so wanna be like Carrie Bradshaw (not the writing about sex part, although I'm sure I could write about that, too)!  Oh, what fun it would be to take out my Macbook ( I use a bulky PC, ugh!), come up with a fresh story that tittitales my soul, lunch out with fab friends in some ritzy joint (my friends prefer to eat in- you know, cafeteria food), and unwind later with cosmopolitans (or white russian) at a really happening bar.  There will be intrigue, drama, tons of shoes, and designer clothes!  Hey, I'm not in some icky office uniform right now, I'm actually rocking the chic power suit and 3 inch pumps I'm wearing, but the over-all blandness of my cubicle and the stark flourescent lights above my head make me feel like a government clerk (no offense to government clerks, I think they're pretty awesome in their own right) who can't wait for 5:30 so I can drive home and watch my usual TV shows, and do my usual bedtime routine, and wake up the next day at 6:00 a.m., as usual.

Sure, I'm rambling.  If I want to be a fashion writer or a gossip columnist, I should switch companies, coz seriously, the one I'm in won't have me writing about who's doing who (not that we have the sort of excitement around here.  Everybody seems to be a friggin' staright arrow!) or who's wearing who (whether fake or authentic).  But if I really think about it seriously, all that excitement about being in a fashion magazine, or a media company, or an advertising agency (my original dream, I graduated with a Mass Comm. degree) will probably wear me out. I mean, I don't really like working longer than I have to -- I hate doing overtime work, I wanna go straight home to my kids,  I don't wanna be sent to some place for long (3 days max) coz I'll miss my family, and I don't think I'm ready for the cut-throat bitchiness in the fashion or advertising industry.  I'm a sweet thirty-something career woman who was never shouted at by my bosses, never had a fight with my co-workers, and never figured in an office intrigue. I'm fragile, hold me :  )

I guess I'm really where I belong.  This office is safe, intrigue-free, and guilt-free (see, I'm slacking off right now and I don't feel at all guilty, hehe). But being a PR officer for a bank (there I spilled it. I work for a bank! isn't this exciting?) can also be exhilirating.  You know, when I let the press in on the bank's strong ROA, ROE, CAR, and NIM, which ultimately translates to my own fat profit sharing check, that's a thrill!  When we have corporate events and there are a lot of left-over food in the buffet that we, of course, can bring home, that's a delight.  When there's nothing to write about yet coz we're waiting for our competitors to come out with their press release first so we could do the necessary adjustments to ours (wink, wink) and I have the time to take long coffee breaks coz I have nothing yet to do, that's a joy. 

Okay, so I don't hate my job.  It's not exactly electrifying but I do get a buzz every now and then.  It's just that today,  as in right now, I'm not getting any jolt.  Hmmm, how about I eat out, (by my lonesome, my officemates had lunch already, guess where) walk a couple of blocks to have aglio olio pasta at Paseo Center, pretend I'm Carrie, having a wonderful lunch with my girlfriends... now, that's just crazy.  But I'll go have lunch now, and definitely not at the cafeteria!  Who knows, I might bump into a local celebrity or see a full-on cat fight on the street between two office girls fighting for the affection of their cute married boss, that'll be exciting!